it's weird how much control you have in relationships with other people. and how they are so dependent on reciprocity (would saying 'simultaneous reciprocity' be redundant?).

then again, it's incredible how little control you have as well. how they come to you, with full spirits of their own, and leave so unexpectedly. sometimes, before you know that they're on their way out. and then you're left .. looking at them, and trying hard to remember what it felt like when they were so very present, just a short time ago.

Ashley

it's the ask-an-important-person-to-be-me-doctoral-chair meeting

Ruth

Don't ask in pirate.

....ha. also yes, scary meeting today. actually, the second. two committee members down, two more to go. ah!

i am so desperate for attention sometimes that it's sickening.
and, the moments when i like anything but contemplation and discussion are so few and far between. they're fun, but they just don't compare.
bonnie had it right when she said that life's best moments are lying in bed, figuring out the world.
it's like i have this undying curiosity, and if i don't get to express it regularly, it bursts. i'm like a teapot, and will start crying out if i'm left just to stew for too long without being tended to.
how come some people get me so well, and yet we can't talk? and others barely understand .. but i just feel so .. fulfilled after having a conversation with them. why does conversation matter so much to me? and why are some conversations so much better than others? escape. it's about escape. escaping the world to slip into a world of our own while we talk. that's what it is. that makes all the difference.